Anger is uncomfortable. We want to walk away from it.
I have a very bad temper. It would not appear that way. My anger is like a dormant volcano. When I was younger it would erupt in rage. It was a hard lesson for me to learn that I needed to confront my anger. I learned to deal directly with the sources of my anger and choose proper channels for expressing my anger. My goal became to move through the anger to arrive at a place of peace with my myself and the situation that caused my anger. Of course, I am still working on that goal.
I learned to confront my anger.
I learned from a class that I took that anger is a secondary emotion. It helps me to dig in and explore why I am angry. Am I hurt about something? Did I experience a disappointment? Often when I address the underlying emotion, like feeling hurt, my anger dissipates.
The next time you get angry, pull out your journal and dive in. Take the journey through the anger and reconcile your emotions. This process can help you to gain a peaceful perspective about the situation. “Seek peace and pursue it.” Psalm 34:14
Here are some questions that you can ask yourself as your sort through your anger.
- Is the level of anger that I feel appropriate for the situation that caused me to be angry?
- Did something or someone cause me to become upset or hurt?
- What about my anger is legitimate and should not be ignored? What is the next best step that I should take?
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The beginning of the year starts with an emphasis on reflecting and planning. We were all planning to have perfect vision for 2020. We are well into this new year. Our lives are once again filled up with busy schedules, problems to solve and for some of us, crises to deal with.
Our daily lives can become jammed packed. We are sandwiched between obligations at work, commitments to family and concerns about loved ones we are responsible for. Our time to reflect and take an inventory of our well being can be squeezed out. We suffer in the long term if we do not build in time for ourselves in the short term.
I recently needed to reduce my activities because of the coronavirus. I am in several high-risk groups. I have a severely compromised immune system. I hated to admit I was in the category described as high-risk. Who wants to self-identify as old? A bout with pneumonia last year reminded me of how fast and hard I go down from an infectious disease. I am grateful for the time to slow down and catch my breath. I am using the slower pace and time at home to reflect on this year and what lies ahead.
I can go weeks, and even months, without taking the time to journal . I know how much it helps me to sort through my emotions or address problems I need to face. Yet, like many things that are good for me, I neglect writing in my journal.
It can be really helpful to pull out your calendar, or open your calendar app, and schedule a meeting with yourself. That’s right put ME in a time slot on the calendar. You can also schedule where you will meet with yourself. Is there a coffee shop or indoor garden you really like?
Schedule a two or three hour block of time to reflect and journal. I find when I go 60 to 90 days out, there is nothing on my schedule. Me time is necessary time. Schedule that needed break today.